Teetering on the precipice of grieving.... Well, I was whisker close to despair today. My painting on grieving, the circles of grief is very complex. So complex as to be confusing. It is sort of like being able to speak a second language pretty well, using multitudes of words, but being unable to explain the depth of your sorrow. There are elements of this painting that work well and other parts that aren't doing it for me. This painting was very easy to get lost in. I went through periods of time this afternoon wondering if I should cover up the whole thing with some white gesso and start over. The problem is that I don't have time to do that. I threw it (well, I wanted to...) in the living room so I could get more distance from it (figuratively and literally) to view it. I went back in the studio and hung my head in my hands. Then I thought...latté. As I stared out my kitchen window at the frozen tundra, sipping my caramel latté, an idea came to mind regarding grief. That for me it often felt like someone was covering me with heavy stones. In the second photo you can see my chalk marks drawing out five stones. I am going to see if this speaks to the heaviness of grief more clearly. On we go...as my sweet mother always says.
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